Monday, March 21, 2011

:) Feeling Good and Better…:)

Whatever our profession is we meet so many people in our daily life. We will meet regular persons like paperboy, milk person, khirana shop guy, woman who sell flowers to us and sometimes we meet strangers while on our regular way to our jobs or travelling to new places…..Do we ever try to recall or remember any one of them, if yes why? What is the reason that we remember only that person not others?



The reasons may be so many but one thing I can assume is the impression they leave on us in that short time may be effective enough to recall or remember them. The impressions can be negative or positive but we will be able to remember them.
Among them we may remember someone for really long time if they made us feel good or better at that particular moment.

In similar way, will any of them remember or recall us the next time we meet them..?
To how many of them we make feel good or better in our daily life…?:)
Or what is the necessity of making them feel good or better …?

We designed our life in such a way where we always try to search for happiness, peacefulness, satisfaction by achieving something for ourselves, our families, our friends and for job we do. Of course it is important to give happiness to our loved ones and whom we love but is it the end of the world…? Is it the end of happiness..?



Mother Theresa had once said. “The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the “feeling of being unloved.” “There is more hunger in the world for “love” and “appreciation” than for bread”. We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must try to remedy this kind of poverty.”

So many of us want to do really good for others but we feel that we don’t get opportunity to do so or things are beyond our levels and limits. I think we really need not to do big things or need not to sacrifice something from our life to do good things. Simple and small things we do for others may get ‘sparking smile’ :) on their faces, it is possible only when we have real wish to make them feel good or better.

By simple appreciation words, by wishing good for the day, by giving something to someone which really not costs anything for us and gives real happiness to them, by saying some nice words when someone is in trouble and by doing little things like this we can make people feel good. By doing this we will also feel happy, good and better...For that day :)



As a person, what makes me feel good is a “smile” :) on someone’s face and if I’m reason for that smile. Believe me that feeling is amazing, it will cherish me for really long time and boost my energy levels…:)

So I have decided that I will try to make people feel good or better as many as I can and as much as I can in my daily life… :) :) :)

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

“ABOUT TRUE LOVE…….”

It’s been really long time, and when I’m back really I feel something to share about important part of our life...called...”LOVE”. We may not realize but it has major role to play in our lives.

We human beings are social entities. As good relationship is the major contributor for remaining good. It is very important to understand the relationships. Especially complex relationships (at least for me...!!) between male and female.


Sharing of love, both giving and taking, brings happiness. That is why it is said that love, not time, heals all wounds. Similarly when love becomes thin, faults appear thicker.

Love and like are feelings, emotional stages of our life. Both sound similar, synonymous, yet they are different. We may like a person or an article but it does not necessarily mean that we love them.

If you are attracted to something or someone, it is liking. But if you care for it and take its onus, it is your love for it. I said ‘onus’. And not possess’. If we love someone, we must care for that person.

If you try to help someone during his/her difficult day, it is your sympathy. But, if your heart cries on listening someone’s sorrow, and if the person’s agony becomes yours then it is not sympathy, it is empathy. Liking someone empathetically is Love. Mathematically, you can express it as –

“Love = Liking + Empathic Caring”

There is a say – “In life, to judge others use your heart and to judge yourself use your head”. Empathy is the ability of a person to see from the other person’s viewpoint.

Love is beautiful and continues to remain beautiful unless it is pampered. Once you try to possess love, its beauty gets spoilt. That is why many times we find expensive household items kept in one corner and treated with sheer negligence. Love is also like that. It is beautiful as attractive, so long as it is out of our reach.

Love is behavior and a feeling, certainly not an article. Hence, never can it be owned. Never try to snatch love. It is natural and cannot become any one’s property. So, we should not try to mix up love with self interest or accomplishment.
IT is often said – “Giving leads to empathic Love”, what is giving? True giving is other oriented and requires the following elements:

• CARE, demonstrating active concern (not theoretical which everyone can have) for the recipient’s life and growth.
• RESPONSIBILITY, responding to his/her expressed/unexpressed need.
• RESPECT, the ability to see the other person as he/she is and be aware of his/her unique individuality
• KNOWLEDGE, you can care for, respond to, and respect the other only if you know him/her deeply.

The more you give the more you love, that is why probably our parents, who have given us more that we ever know, undoubtedly love us more that we love them. This is because deep and intimate love emanates from knowledge and giving: it comes not overnight but over time.

Where true love is present, happiness is bound to come. “About True Love”, swami Vivekananda in one of his writings had said:

“I would like to share something on the nature of love. I once had a friend who grew to very close to me. Once when we were sitting at the edge of a swimming pool, she filled the palm of her hand with little water and held it before me, and said this: “You see this water carefully contained on my hand? It symbolizes Love.” This was how I saw it: “As long as you keep your hand carnally open and allow it to remain there it will always be there. However, if you attempt to close your fingers around it and try to possess it, it will spill through the first cracks it finds.”

This is the greatest mistake that people commit when they meet love, they try to possess it, they demand, they expect: and just like water spilling out of our hand, love will run away from us. For love is meant to be free, you cannot change its nature. If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.

• Give and don’t expect.
• Advise, but don’t order.
• Ask, but never demand.

It might sound simple, but it is a lesson that may take a lifetime to truly practice. It is the secret of True. To truly practice it, “You must sincerely feel no expectations from those who you love, and yet an unconditional caring.”

Love lasts longer only when there is no mutual expectation, If at all expectations are present, they must be realistic.